If you could live inside either a TV show or a movie, which one would it be? Kind of like in Last Action Hero, you'd be subject to living the same kind of plot and storyline structure as the TV show or movie itself, yet you wouldn't take over any of the character roles. You'd just kind of be thrown into the mix as you are now, yet you'd be living a lifestyle as constructed up to that point by screenwriters. You wouldn't be controlled by the writers though -- complete free will.

So what's it to be?

For someone who's such a media junkie, I've become very tired of the information feed that's coming in. I realized it earlier this evening when I was on my way out to go grocery shopping and it occurred to me that I hadn't read today's newspaper yet -- nor had I seen a newspaper in 5 days -- yet I didn't feel a burning desire to know what was going on in the world anymore. When I finally got around to reading Tuesday's paper, it was 1:15AM at night and I blitzed through it within around 15 minutes.

This media war being waged in Afghanistan comes back with the same information every day: we're kicking ass and taking names, the Taliban is on the run, Osama Bin Laden still hasn't been found. Get excited and worried all over again, there's another alert to be sounded yet we still don't know when or where anything's going to come -- ooh, this time it's different because we don't even know what form the attack will take. Budget cuts need to be made in Massachusetts so our stupid-ass governor is again doing moronic things; this time she's calling for belt-tightening among programs like child education, yet she's not reigning in her advisers' or senators' personal spending allowances. Once again, peace in the Middle East isn't going to happen this Christmas.

The dull and plodding monotony of the news has led to the sensationalism that I've been trying so hard to avoid, yet TV stations who do nightly news programs have been hyping these outrageous stories just to keep their viewership up. I mean, who can dare to miss a story about how pet owners might have bought defective leashes that might cause their pets to trip and fall? I can.

Maybe it's not just me who's stuck in a rut. Maybe it's the whole world, and the reason why I've become so bored with the news is not my own personal malaise, but one that's sweeping the entire nation. That kind of makes me feel better, because then it's beyond my personal outlook and control. So I shouldn't feel so bad about pulling the covers over my head and shutting out the outside world, eh?

For someone who's such a media junkie, I've become very tired of the information feed that's coming in. I realized it earlier this evening when I was on my way out to go grocery shopping and it occurred to me that I hadn't read today's newspaper yet -- nor had I seen a newspaper in 5 days -- yet I didn't feel a burning desire to know what was going on in the world anymore. When I finally got around to reading Tuesday's paper, it was 1:15AM at night and I blitzed through it within around 15 minutes.

This media war being waged in Afghanistan comes back with the same information every day: we're kicking ass and taking names, the Taliban is on the run, Osama Bin Laden still hasn't been found. Get excited and worried all over again, there's another alert to be sounded yet we still don't know when or where anything's going to come -- ooh, this time it's different because we don't even know what form the attack will take. Budget cuts need to be made in Massachusetts so our stupid-ass governor is again doing moronic things; this time she's calling for belt-tightening among programs like child education, yet she's not reigning in her advisers' or senators' personal spending allowances. Once again, peace in the Middle East isn't going to happen this Christmas.

The dull and plodding monotony of the news has led to the sensationalism that I've been trying so hard to avoid, yet TV stations who do nightly news programs have been hyping these outrageous stories just to keep their viewership up. I mean, who can dare to miss a story about how pet owners might have bought defective leashes that might cause their pets to trip and fall? I can.

Maybe it's not just me who's stuck in a rut. Maybe it's the whole world, and the reason why I've become so bored with the news is not my own personal malaise, but one that's sweeping the entire nation. That kind of makes me feel better, because then it's beyond my personal outlook and control. So I shouldn't feel so bad about pulling the covers over my head and shutting out the outside world, eh?

Can someone tell me when Geraldo Rivera ever gained enough credibility to be taken even quasi-seriously as a news journalist? This is the same guy who started in the talk show world and became famous when a guest broke a chair across his face, then went on to break into Al Capone's safe in a two-hour nationally-televised event that produced nothing but junk.

Now he's playing war correspondent for Fox News Channel, showing off his little compound and the slumber party they're having there with all their sleeping bags, and stumbling over the question of whether or not he's carrying a gun.

Will someone please put us out of our misery and leave him in Afghanistan when all is said and done there?

Can someone tell me when Geraldo Rivera ever gained enough credibility to be taken even quasi-seriously as a news journalist? This is the same guy who started in the talk show world and became famous when a guest broke a chair across his face, then went on to break into Al Capone's safe in a two-hour nationally-televised event that produced nothing but junk.

Now he's playing war correspondent for Fox News Channel, showing off his little compound and the slumber party they're having there with all their sleeping bags, and stumbling over the question of whether or not he's carrying a gun.

Will someone please put us out of our misery and leave him in Afghanistan when all is said and done there?

Melly wrote something about young kids being impressionable as far as picking up swears. I am living proof of that (though I don't remember it).

When I was 3, my parents dropped me off for a week at my grandparents' house while they went on vacation. Before they left, my mom took my grandmother aside and asked her to please watch what she said, since my mom thought my grandmother was a bit too free with unloading swears. My grandmother said, "What? I don't swear! Don't worry, he'll be fine!"

A week later, my parents came home well-rested and relaxed, and came to pick me up. Things were going well. My mom asked my grandmother if she had been careful about swearing around me, to which my grandmother replied, "Of course!" Unfortunately, at that moment, I happened to drop a plate in the kitchen, and my parents and my grandmother heard it shatter, then heard a little 3-year-old voice squeak out, "Oh, shit!"

Thus it was proven that my grandmother swore, kids are impressionable, and my career in pottymouthing began early.

Melly wrote something about young kids being impressionable as far as picking up swears. I am living proof of that (though I don't remember it).

When I was 3, my parents dropped me off for a week at my grandparents' house while they went on vacation. Before they left, my mom took my grandmother aside and asked her to please watch what she said, since my mom thought my grandmother was a bit too free with unloading swears. My grandmother said, "What? I don't swear! Don't worry, he'll be fine!"

A week later, my parents came home well-rested and relaxed, and came to pick me up. Things were going well. My mom asked my grandmother if she had been careful about swearing around me, to which my grandmother replied, "Of course!" Unfortunately, at that moment, I happened to drop a plate in the kitchen, and my parents and my grandmother heard it shatter, then heard a little 3-year-old voice squeak out, "Oh, shit!"

Thus it was proven that my grandmother swore, kids are impressionable, and my career in pottymouthing began early.

Yes, entries today have been hampered by the 5 hour midday nap I took. And I'm currently assembling this week's assignments for Blogger Insider, we have 70 people signed up now so it's taking a little longer than it did last week. You should have your assignments within the next few hours.

On a side note, I can't think of a musical group that better personifies the sound most closely linkable to a cold winter day than the Smiths. A friend of mine once told me that the Smiths should've titled one of their CDs "Music to Commit Suicide To," because their songs are so depressing. That's why today, I'm listening to No Doubt. Yes, No Doubt -- full of that Gwenny Goodness that makes a man want to live for the day when she'll finally realize he's the guy for her and drop Gavin Rossdale quicker than a starving person can hoover a Twinkie.

Yes, entries today have been hampered by the 5 hour midday nap I took. And I'm currently assembling this week's assignments for Blogger Insider, we have 70 people signed up now so it's taking a little longer than it did last week. You should have your assignments within the next few hours.

On a side note, I can't think of a musical group that better personifies the sound most closely linkable to a cold winter day than the Smiths. A friend of mine once told me that the Smiths should've titled one of their CDs "Music to Commit Suicide To," because their songs are so depressing. That's why today, I'm listening to No Doubt. Yes, No Doubt -- full of that Gwenny Goodness that makes a man want to live for the day when she'll finally realize he's the guy for her and drop Gavin Rossdale quicker than a starving person can hoover a Twinkie.

Can anyone else think of a city/state that claims a sports team that's geographically not within their borders besides New York? (The Giants play in the Meadowlands, which is in New Jersey. Don't the Nets also play in Jersey, or are they "the New Jersey Nets" now?)

The Statue of Liberty -- a widely-known symbol of New York -- is also technically a part of New Jersey as well, y'know...

Can anyone else think of a city/state that claims a sports team that's geographically not within their borders besides New York? (The Giants play in the Meadowlands, which is in New Jersey. Don't the Nets also play in Jersey, or are they "the New Jersey Nets" now?)

The Statue of Liberty -- a widely-known symbol of New York -- is also technically a part of New Jersey as well, y'know...

Hey folks... I have returned to the land of high rents, idiot drivers & bad accents. I slept maybe 2 hours on the plane, which was the red-eye flight, so right now my body clock is so screwed up that if I closed my eyes -- if I didn't fall asleep immediately -- I'd say offhandedly it's around 7PM, not 7AM.

Either way, as always, lessons are learned when you journey to a faroff land, and here's the second edition of What I Learned in Southern California:

- You will never feel as poor as when you are walking the streets of downtown Beverly Hills.
- It's not a real Mormon temple unless it's the building with the most Christmas lights in a square mile.
- It actually does rain sometimes in Los Angeles. When it does, people go to the movies because most everything else to do there is outdoors and doesn't have a roof.
- While jaywalking may be a way of life in Boston, that's not so in L.A. However, they have crosswalks that cross intersections diagonally, which actually is a pretty decent idea in some places.
- In 'n' Out Burger is still the best fast food available anywhere.
- Banana Republic stores in L.A. sell winter coats. I have no idea why.
- I wish they all could be California girls.
- I still can't get enough of System of a Down's song "Chop Suey," especially when mildly drunk from a couple different kinds of martinis and screaming the lyrics along with one of my best friends while bombing down the 405 freeway. (No, I wasn't driving. She was, and she was sober.) Although I seem to be one of the few people who actually knows all the words. As in Part I, it's called "The World Famous KROQ" for a reason.

I'll send out the assignments for Blogger Insider later today. Right now, I literally have over 500 e-mails to sift through from just these past few days to see if anything needs to be answered immediately, then I'm goin' to bed. More on my adventures in the land of sun & fun later on today.

Hey folks... I have returned to the land of high rents, idiot drivers & bad accents. I slept maybe 2 hours on the plane, which was the red-eye flight, so right now my body clock is so screwed up that if I closed my eyes -- if I didn't fall asleep immediately -- I'd say offhandedly it's around 7PM, not 7AM.

Either way, as always, lessons are learned when you journey to a faroff land, and here's the second edition of What I Learned in Southern California:

- You will never feel as poor as when you are walking the streets of downtown Beverly Hills.
- It's not a real Mormon temple unless it's the building with the most Christmas lights in a square mile.
- It actually does rain sometimes in Los Angeles. When it does, people go to the movies because most everything else to do there is outdoors and doesn't have a roof.
- While jaywalking may be a way of life in Boston, that's not so in L.A. However, they have crosswalks that cross intersections diagonally, which actually is a pretty decent idea in some places.
- In 'n' Out Burger is still the best fast food available anywhere.
- Banana Republic stores in L.A. sell winter coats. I have no idea why.
- I wish they all could be California girls.
- I still can't get enough of System of a Down's song "Chop Suey," especially when mildly drunk from a couple different kinds of martinis and screaming the lyrics along with one of my best friends while bombing down the 405 freeway. (No, I wasn't driving. She was, and she was sober.) Although I seem to be one of the few people who actually knows all the words. As in Part I, it's called "The World Famous KROQ" for a reason.

I'll send out the assignments for Blogger Insider later today. Right now, I literally have over 500 e-mails to sift through from just these past few days to see if anything needs to be answered immediately, then I'm goin' to bed. More on my adventures in the land of sun & fun later on today.

Despite a 2 hour maintenance delay and a bad movie (Planet of the Apes in case you're interested), I have arrived in the sunny City of Angels. It's kind of mind-boggling to fly over such open territory that hasn't been touched by man yet, though I did see a huge field perfectly mowed to look like a compass encapsulated in a circle, which I'm amazed someone could do on the ground to make it look so perfect to someone flying overhead at 35,000 feet.

If that wasn't enough, the scene of Christmas lights on palm trees was off-kilter enough to make me realize I'm in a land that does not know winter. But I'll take that over 2 months of 10-20 degree weather.

I've been awake for almost 23 hours now, all things considered, so I'm going to crash on the couch now. Test tomorrow, argh. Then more enjoying the warm California sun.

Despite a 2 hour maintenance delay and a bad movie (Planet of the Apes in case you're interested), I have arrived in the sunny City of Angels. It's kind of mind-boggling to fly over such open territory that hasn't been touched by man yet, though I did see a huge field perfectly mowed to look like a compass encapsulated in a circle, which I'm amazed someone could do on the ground to make it look so perfect to someone flying overhead at 35,000 feet.

If that wasn't enough, the scene of Christmas lights on palm trees was off-kilter enough to make me realize I'm in a land that does not know winter. But I'll take that over 2 months of 10-20 degree weather.

I've been awake for almost 23 hours now, all things considered, so I'm going to crash on the couch now. Test tomorrow, argh. Then more enjoying the warm California sun.