Ahhh, St. Patrick's Day. The one day every year I can confess that I really do love Irish women and not get strange looks. I don't know what it is, but I just seem naturally attracted to women who have the usual stereotypical Irish features -- red hair and green eyes, or black hair and dark eyes. St. Patrick's Day is another one of those days when I wish I was back in Boston. There are a couple of Irish pubs out here in L.A., but nothing even comes close to the insane amount of Irish pride that flows like green beer through Boston on St. Patrick's Day. Have yourself a drink and right-click and save as. And don't forget to wear green today, or your co-workers will make fun of you. Flogging Molly - "Drunken Lullabies"

So, I've kind of been casually seeing someone over the past few weeks. Was seeing someone, rather. I don't think it will continue, and it's kind of just fading away instead of burning out. (No, I seriously doubt she knows about this site... I have doubts that she even knows what my last name is.) She was fun to hang out with and all, but there were small things nagging at me that I kind of overlooked because I was having fun. Then one night recently, we were having a conversation about a topic that she claimed to be very well-versed on and she knew I was pretty familiar with it too, and she started giving me information that I knew wasn't true. In fact, the correct information was literally right in front of her, and yet she didn't even realize it. That's when it kind of really started to irritate me. She was breaking a cardinal rule. She was being a bit of a poser. And it turned me off to a point where whenever I talked to her since that conversation, it was niggling in the back of my head. I've kind of been ducking her calls recently -- to my defense, she tends to call very late at night when I'm already asleep and has woken me up more than a few times, and it's damn-nigh impossible for me to be coherent when I'm asleep. I guess I'm either waiting for her to get the picture that the ride is over or for us to actually connect and I have to break it off myself. Am I being shallow? Perhaps. Am I expecting too much from someone who's spent much more time than me in this land of image and effervescence? Maybe. But if there's one thing that I always want out of a relationship, it's a sense of trust that the other person is being real with me.

We have a huge four-level underground parking garage in the building I work in. It's all high-tech and stuff with a digital readout at the entrance and on each level saying how many parking spaces are left on that level. And since I get in kind of late in the morning, the first level is frequently full by the time I get to work. My question is... who's the idiot who sees that there's only 1 spot left on the level and still goes in there and drives around for 20 minutes looking for that 1 remaining open spot? I know I said I wasn't going to get all political, but this is just too good not to share... Right-click and save us, or I'll bust a weapon of mass destruction in yo' ass. "W Rap"

I don't usually do forwards, but it's for a good cause (I am admittedly pro-breast), and I can probably reach more than the designated 10 people if I do it this way than over e-mail... It only takes a minute.... Please tell 10 friends to tell 10 friends today! The Breast Cancer site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota of donating at least one free mammogram a day to an underprivileged woman. It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "donating a mammogram" for free (pink window in the middle). This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate mammogram in exchange for advertising. Here's the website! Pass it along to people you know. www.thebreastcancersite.com

Okay, sorry for the mystery that surrounded the last post on this topic. However, here it is: As I wrote last Sunday, my singing group went into the studio and recorded a bunch of tracks completely live. And here's a completely live, completely unmixed take of my group that I started, with me on the lead vocals. So for all of you who want to know what I sound like, here's your chance. Right-click and save as, or I'll kick you in the jimmies. Quarterlife Crisis - "Pinball Wizard"

Hello, and welcome to another episode of Embarrassing Moments in Keith's Life. This scene takes place in a random West Los Angeles apartment during a party on a random Saturday night that just might be this past Saturday night. It stars KEITH, our hapless hero; KEITH'S FRIEND, who invited him to the party; HOST, whose apartment it is and who KEITH has just met that night because he was invited by KEITH'S FRIEND; and PARTY ATTENDEE, a good-looking woman who is attending the party and is a friend of HOST. SCENE: PARTY ATTENDEE enters the apartment. KEITH and KEITH'S FRIEND are standing close to the door. KEITH: Hi! PARTY ATTENDEE: Hi! HOST: Oh, hey, [PARTY ATTENDEE]! PARTY ATTENDEE and HOST greet each other and exchange pleasantries. KEITH: Hi again! PARTY ATTENDEE: Hi! KEITH'S FRIEND: Hi! I'm [KEITH'S FRIEND]. PARTY ATTENDEE: Hi, [KEITH'S FRIEND]. KEITH: Hi, I'm Keith. PARTY ATTENDEE: Yes, we've met before. KEITH: I know, we met five seconds ago. PARTY ATTENDEE: No. KEITH: Wait, we've met previously to five seconds ago when I said hi to you the first time around? PARTY ATTENDEE: Yes. KEITH: You're kidding, right? PARTY ATTENDEE: No. We went out on a couple of dates about a year and a half ago. KEITH: Okay, you're really kidding now, right? PARTY ATTENDEE: No, I'm friends with [KEITH'S FORMER ROOMMATE]. You don't remember? KEITH slowly begins to turn white, then an extreme shade of red as he recognizes PARTY ATTENDEE. KEITH: Soo... uhhh... how've you been? END SCENE.

Waking up earlier on a Saturday than I usually do on a workday, especially after only 6 hours' sleep: Physically painful. Dressing up in a suit for the first time since September: Almost emotionally scarring. Listening to Al Franken speak for an hour, then meeting him and having him personally autograph my copy of one of his books: Priceless and well worth the effort.

I do take pleasures in the simple things from time to time, and people have been known to remark that it doesn't take much to make me happy (and what makes me happy occasionally makes me go "eeeeee!" like Mini-Me as well). This is frequently true. Things like TiVo, bunnies and dark chocolate make me extra-special super happy. Another thing that makes me extra-special super happy is Esquire magazine. I don't read it for the fashion stuff. I really do read it for the articles. I think Esquire has some of the best-written and most compelling material out there. In fact, the only two arguments I have with one of my oldest friends are (1) Red Sox vs. Yankees and (2) Esquire vs. The New Yorker (personally, I can't stand The New Yorker, but even though he thinks it's the best, he concedes that Esquire is a close second). So I didn't feel all that bad that one of my neighbors caught me doing the Happy Dance™ today at the mailbox when I found the April issue waiting for me. (At least she didn't catch me doing the Humpty Dance™. That might've been a little embarrassing in public.) Not only that, but this month's issue is the music issue. Talk about the best of both worlds! I was almost salivating when I saw that. Honestly, if I were forced to leave the music industry and never come back, my next attempt at a dream job would be to write for Esquire. Unfortunately, I will not be able to accomplish something else this week that makes me happy, and that's sleep way late on Saturday. My company is having a convention in Santa Monica, and Al Franken is coming to speak Saturday morning at 9am. So it's for a good cause that I'm waking up earlier than I would on a workday to go hear him do his thing. Now check this shiznayit out. It's a pretty cool mashup for your Friday, and I'm posting it because it makes me happy, and I'm all about sharing the happiness. Right-click and save as, or I will become unhappy. And you wouldn't like me when I'm unhappy... Alex C - "Mystery Boulevard into the Broken Fire" (Green Day vs. Thirteen Senses vs. Smash Mouth)

There are some days when I just feel like chucking it all, selling everything I own, packing up just a few belongings and moving to some some Caribbean island. There's something about the simple life that I find appealing given how our lives have all kind of accelerated to Internet speed. One of my favorite vacations was to Tortola, a small island in the British Virgin Islands. It was one of the most relaxing times I've ever had in my entire life. I remember one night walking down to the seashore and sitting down in the sand, listening to the water rush onto the shore (and for those of you who know me, you know that I always need some kind of background noise, so that's pretty significant that I didn't need any then), just looking out over the water and looking up at the thousands of stars in the sky. It was years ago, but I still remember it clearly and think about it. Right-click and save as. And if anyone -- and I mean anyone -- makes fun of me for listening to Madonna, I will find some way to invent a transporter, beam myself to your location and beat you until you too love this song. Madonna - "La Isla Bonita"

There are few constants in this world, but one for sure is the fact that Ebola is not the most contagious virus out there. That dubious honor belongs to Disney's "It's a Small World." If someone mentions it or starts singing it, it will stick in your head and replay itself over and over, and you'll find yourself singing it and begin cursing the person who stuck it in your head. And it's like the only way to get rid of this insidious thing living in your brain is to pass it on to someone else, just like that girl who crawled out of the TV in The Ring. "You have seven daaaaays..." In other news, I got this forward today, which has got to be one of the funniest things I've gotten in a while: An operations manager for Jack in the Box was late for a meeting and called his boss to tell him he was running late. As he was leaving the voicemail message, he witnessed an accident and went on to provide "play by play" of the incident. This is the actual voicemail message. It was forwarded so many times within Jack in the Box, it crashed their voicemail server. Click here to hear it.

Okay, despite an almost overwhelming desire to get an iPod, I've decided to hold off for a little while. Apparently, the company that makes the chipset they put in iPods has come out with a new version of chips that require less power, which means that next generation of iPods may have some kind of super battery capacity of like 3 days straight or something. On top of which, who knows what keen features they'll throw on the damn thing when they come out with the 5G version? Personally, I've mostly been waiting because I wanted the iPod to have an FM radio on it before I got one, and I'm starting to realize that Apple just isn't going to put a radio on the iPod. Call me backward, but I still listen to radio and I still enjoy the power of radio. The industry as a whole is getting a black eye these days, but I think that there are definitely some shining spots here and there. Plus, radio has some of the most talented, creative and funny people working in it, and they amuse me on a daily basis, and amusing me is what it's all about. But I suppose that doesn't stop me from helping others fill their iPods. Nox, this one's for you. But you, like everyone, need to right-click and save as. N*E*R*D - "Rock Star" (Jason Nevins Remix Edit)

Okay, so I'm a wee bit drunk. Okay, so I'm more drunk than I was last night when I had an entertaining drunken IM conversation with Jennifer. But dammit, I deserved the alcohol today after recording in a studio for three hours straight with my singing group. It was hot in the studio, it was draining, and it wasn't as fun as a few rounds of mini-golf. But it was productive, and it gave us the excuse to go drinking heavily. What have we got to show for it? Well, we have a bunch of completely live, non-mixed-down tracks, some of which sound good... others, not so good. And if you're good, I may post some tasty morsels for you to listen to later.

Lunch today with a record label friend and a couple of co-workers at Fred Segal's on Melrose, which is always good for some celebrity-spotting -- last time, I saw Steve Martin there. Unfortunately, no celebrities were there to be spotted today, though I did completely fall in love with someone who was sitting at another table across the room. Of course, as soon as I sat down, I said, "I would like to announce that I am in love with that redhead sitting at the table to my left." My friend knows I try to date within the faith, so he asked me if she was Jewish -- here's the best part: She was wearing a Jewish star on a necklace! Did I mention I have a particular weakness for redheads? And it wasn't that strawberry blonde thing either, she was full-on deep auburn red. Sigh. Here's the crappy part: She finished lunch and left before I gathered up enough nerve to go over and talk to her (she was with a friend, so it's not like I could just sit down at her table -- I'd be interrupting). And it's not like I'm the kind of guy who'd go running after someone and chase her down in the parking lot -- in this town, I'd probably be perceived as a stalker and Maced on the spot. So I'm hoping there's a slim chance she reads this blog and will e-mail me so I can pledge my undying love for her. Or at least take her out for dinner sometime. It's Friday, so it's time for the random 10 songs from my iTunes thing: 1. "Push and Pull" - Nikka Costa 2. "Hysteria" - Def Leppard 3. "Breakfast in America" - Supertramp 4. "Sister Havana" - Urge Overkill 5. "Rock and Roll (Could Never Hip Hop Like This)" - Handsome Boy Modeling School 6. "Cold Beverage" - G. Love & Special Sauce 7. "Peter Piper" - Run D.M.C. 8. "Give It All" - Rise Against 9. "Pretend We're Dead" - L7 10. "Karmastition" - Alicia Keys vs. Stevie Wonder (mixed by Go Home Productions)

So, there are those who might say that I look "preppy." The adjective "clean cut" might also apply. Well, screw that. Beneath this exterior beats the heart of a rocker. Several years ago, when I still lived in Boston, I was challenged one night while out at a bar with a bunch of co-workers. I was drunkenly told, "You know, you keep saying you're some big rock guy, but you don't look like one." And being that I was also drunk at the time, I said, "Oh yeah? Screw that!" So I went up to the bar band and asked them if I could sing with them. They then asked if I could sing. Yes, I can sing, but my friends know that not only do I tend to sing a lot, I tend to sing more when I'm drunk. So it was not an issue for me to get up and do my thing with the band. And when I got offstage, my co-workers all greeted me with dropped jaws and a few variants on the responses "holy crap!" and "you weren't kidding!" and "daaaaaamn!" To give you some idea of what I pulled off, here's the song I did. Right-click and save as, or I will stab you with my devil-horn hand gesture. Buckcherry - "Lit Up"

Ohmigod, if I have to see that Hilary & Haylie Duff commercial for those stupid Liquid Ice things, I may be forced to take someone's life. Preferably not my own. Possibly the ad exec who came up with the bright idea for that commercial.