So I'm really getting sick of the sensationalism being propagated by the media, and I'm about ready to grab a stick or a two-by-four, hop in my car and go driving around the country to every newspaper, newsmagazine, TV and radio newsroom, and just start smacking editors and reporters upside the head. What are you thinking, putting together these stupid sensationalist pieces? All you're doing is riling up all the survivalists and the paranoids, then setting them loose on the rest of us level-headed people! You don't have to deal with these morons, because you're sitting in your offices dishing it out to them! They love you for giving them something to worry about! And the rest of us hate you because we have to deal with them!

For example, Fox 25 here in Boston did this piece on their 10PM news last night on just how open our borders with Canada are. I saw the promos for it, which was basically a camera pointed out the window of a car at desolate land, while a disembodied voice said, "This is the U.S.... aaaaaand this is Canada." The announcer then came on and said in his sinister voice something along the lines of, "Open borders. See how easy it is to cross between the U.S. and Canada. Is our government doing anything to protect us?" The thing is, it looked like any space of desolate land. It could've been Iowa that they were filming for all we know. There was no sign to say "You are now entering Canada. Don't litter, eh?"

And this is the part in the rant where I once again rail against our government's incompetence and lack of common sense. Need I remind you that the guys who took over the planes on September 11th all had student visas granted by our government, so stricter borders don't matter because they had government permission to enter our country? They didn't drive into the U.S. from Canada, they probably flew into JFK along with tens of thousands of other foreigners. And yet, a measure by our government to federalize airport security -- basically, to make sure security guards at airports were federally employed and met certain personnel standards, instead of using rent-a-cops who have been responsible for security breaches at almost every major airport since they reopened with "stricter security" -- was struck down before it even left Congress.

Furthermore, it's not like terrorists bring all their hijacking and bombmaking material into the country with them, so it wouldn't matter if we stopped them at the border, they'd probably still pass inspection. Timothy McVeigh didn't leave the country to make the bomb that exploded in Oklahoma City, he made it right here within our own borders. And just about anyone can buy a knife or a gun, they could probably get one in a few hours from some guy downtown and given the current state of airport security, anyone could probably get a gun or knife on a plane too -- hell, some people already have.

On top of all that, hazardous biological materials aren't licensed. According to an article I read a few days ago, almost every university or biological research lab in the country has some form of virus -- either deadly or extremely harmful -- in their possession but they're not required to register it. They only have to register it if they're transporting it or selling it, which is how the government tracked down a lab in Georgia selling viruses when some guy in the Midwest claimed he bought anthrax over the Internet (he didn't -- he only bought antidote, but the scary thing is that this lab had bubonic plague for sale over the Internet).

So maybe I should include a few government offices in my whacking-with-a-two-by-four spree. Anyone want to come with me? It'll be fun.

So I'm really getting sick of the sensationalism being propagated by the media, and I'm about ready to grab a stick or a two-by-four, hop in my car and go driving around the country to every newspaper, newsmagazine, TV and radio newsroom, and just start smacking editors and reporters upside the head. What are you thinking, putting together these stupid sensationalist pieces? All you're doing is riling up all the survivalists and the paranoids, then setting them loose on the rest of us level-headed people! You don't have to deal with these morons, because you're sitting in your offices dishing it out to them! They love you for giving them something to worry about! And the rest of us hate you because we have to deal with them!

For example, Fox 25 here in Boston did this piece on their 10PM news last night on just how open our borders with Canada are. I saw the promos for it, which was basically a camera pointed out the window of a car at desolate land, while a disembodied voice said, "This is the U.S.... aaaaaand this is Canada." The announcer then came on and said in his sinister voice something along the lines of, "Open borders. See how easy it is to cross between the U.S. and Canada. Is our government doing anything to protect us?" The thing is, it looked like any space of desolate land. It could've been Iowa that they were filming for all we know. There was no sign to say "You are now entering Canada. Don't litter, eh?"

And this is the part in the rant where I once again rail against our government's incompetence and lack of common sense. Need I remind you that the guys who took over the planes on September 11th all had student visas granted by our government, so stricter borders don't matter because they had government permission to enter our country? They didn't drive into the U.S. from Canada, they probably flew into JFK along with tens of thousands of other foreigners. And yet, a measure by our government to federalize airport security -- basically, to make sure security guards at airports were federally employed and met certain personnel standards, instead of using rent-a-cops who have been responsible for security breaches at almost every major airport since they reopened with "stricter security" -- was struck down before it even left Congress.

Furthermore, it's not like terrorists bring all their hijacking and bombmaking material into the country with them, so it wouldn't matter if we stopped them at the border, they'd probably still pass inspection. Timothy McVeigh didn't leave the country to make the bomb that exploded in Oklahoma City, he made it right here within our own borders. And just about anyone can buy a knife or a gun, they could probably get one in a few hours from some guy downtown and given the current state of airport security, anyone could probably get a gun or knife on a plane too -- hell, some people already have.

On top of all that, hazardous biological materials aren't licensed. According to an article I read a few days ago, almost every university or biological research lab in the country has some form of virus -- either deadly or extremely harmful -- in their possession but they're not required to register it. They only have to register it if they're transporting it or selling it, which is how the government tracked down a lab in Georgia selling viruses when some guy in the Midwest claimed he bought anthrax over the Internet (he didn't -- he only bought antidote, but the scary thing is that this lab had bubonic plague for sale over the Internet).

So maybe I should include a few government offices in my whacking-with-a-two-by-four spree. Anyone want to come with me? It'll be fun.

I'm really taking exception to Acting Governor Jane Swift's actions, especially over the past few weeks. And it really makes me wonder why the hell she's so popular and her approval rating is fairly high.

Let's take a look at the front page of this morning's Boston Globe, shall we? The article on the top of the page talks about how Jane originally backed an enormous severance package for Virginia Buckingham, who was director of Massport -- the organization responsible for Logan Airport and its rather weak security. The severance package includes a $175,000 severance, an additional 9 months' pay worth $112,500 and, on top of all that, a two-year consulting contract with the state for another $62,500. The first point of irony in this situation is that Swift didn't say anything about the deal until it became public, then yesterday she said that due to public outcry she was going to try to renegotiate it, now today she's saying that she didn't realize how big it was. Of course you knew the terms of the deal, Swiftie, because you had to approve them yourself due to the fact that Massport is a government organization and the head of Massport reports to you! And saying that you were going to renegotiate it because of public complaints means that you didn't think there was anything wrong with it in the first place.

Which makes her next move even more puzzling. At the bottom of the front page, there's an article about how Swiftie has asked for the resignation of two Massachusetts Turnpike Authority board members because she thinks they were being "fiscally irresponsible" for delaying toll increases by six months on the Mass Pike as well as suggesting a plan to re-implement tolls in Western Massachusetts and in Newton. (The West Newton tolls as well as the tolls on the Pike west of Springfield were all taken down years ago as part of a plan to phase out tolls on the Pike completely because they were initially put up to pay for the construction of the Pike itself which is now paid for, but now due to an almost $14 billion cost overrun on the Big Dig, they need revenue). Apparently, these guys that she's asking to resign are in favor of delaying the toll increases and putting more pressure on the contractors building the Big Dig -- which I support too, since I see no reason why I should pay for the contractors' screwing around. I mean, $14 billion over cost, and that's not including the original estimate of how much it would take! I should definitely not have to pony that up, the government should lean on the contractors to make up some of the cash they burned through. I really don't see how Swiftie can say on the hand that these guys on the Turnpike Authority board are being fiscally irresponsible by trying to save taxpayers some cash, while on the other hand she's throwing gobs of cash at someone who's not even going to be directly working for the state anymore. Now that to me is fiscal irresponsibility. So maybe we should ask for her resignation?

Massachusetts is such a screwed-up state.

I'm really taking exception to Acting Governor Jane Swift's actions, especially over the past few weeks. And it really makes me wonder why the hell she's so popular and her approval rating is fairly high.

Let's take a look at the front page of this morning's Boston Globe, shall we? The article on the top of the page talks about how Jane originally backed an enormous severance package for Virginia Buckingham, who was director of Massport -- the organization responsible for Logan Airport and its rather weak security. The severance package includes a $175,000 severance, an additional 9 months' pay worth $112,500 and, on top of all that, a two-year consulting contract with the state for another $62,500. The first point of irony in this situation is that Swift didn't say anything about the deal until it became public, then yesterday she said that due to public outcry she was going to try to renegotiate it, now today she's saying that she didn't realize how big it was. Of course you knew the terms of the deal, Swiftie, because you had to approve them yourself due to the fact that Massport is a government organization and the head of Massport reports to you! And saying that you were going to renegotiate it because of public complaints means that you didn't think there was anything wrong with it in the first place.

Which makes her next move even more puzzling. At the bottom of the front page, there's an article about how Swiftie has asked for the resignation of two Massachusetts Turnpike Authority board members because she thinks they were being "fiscally irresponsible" for delaying toll increases by six months on the Mass Pike as well as suggesting a plan to re-implement tolls in Western Massachusetts and in Newton. (The West Newton tolls as well as the tolls on the Pike west of Springfield were all taken down years ago as part of a plan to phase out tolls on the Pike completely because they were initially put up to pay for the construction of the Pike itself which is now paid for, but now due to an almost $14 billion cost overrun on the Big Dig, they need revenue). Apparently, these guys that she's asking to resign are in favor of delaying the toll increases and putting more pressure on the contractors building the Big Dig -- which I support too, since I see no reason why I should pay for the contractors' screwing around. I mean, $14 billion over cost, and that's not including the original estimate of how much it would take! I should definitely not have to pony that up, the government should lean on the contractors to make up some of the cash they burned through. I really don't see how Swiftie can say on the hand that these guys on the Turnpike Authority board are being fiscally irresponsible by trying to save taxpayers some cash, while on the other hand she's throwing gobs of cash at someone who's not even going to be directly working for the state anymore. Now that to me is fiscal irresponsibility. So maybe we should ask for her resignation?

Massachusetts is such a screwed-up state.

So I woke up this morning and Mylo wasn't here. While my room is now sparklingly... okay, I won't exaggerate that much... decently clean, it was still fun to have the cute little bastard around. His owner has already e-mailed me this morning to say that he must've really enjoyed staying at my place because he's a little depressed right now. She also said he's particularly horny. I must've really turned him on... enchanted him with my wiles and my pajama pant legs. Well, they say the way to every man's heart is through his stomach, and I certainly fed Mylo well. Who knew rabbits like bananas?

I started sifting through some of the MP3s I downloaded last night and put on Built to Spill's "Strange." The song was recommended to me by a friend who absolutely raved about it. He knows that I've been on the prowl for a new sound, some new music that really winds my clock, and he promised this song would get me going. I played it. It wasn't bad, but I liked it more when I heard the first time -- when it was called "Where Is My Mind?" and it was by the Pixies. And yes, you've heard that song, it played during the ending of Fight Club. So if anyone knows of any new music that I might like, send suggestions. I'm dyin' ovah heah.

So I woke up this morning and Mylo wasn't here. While my room is now sparklingly... okay, I won't exaggerate that much... decently clean, it was still fun to have the cute little bastard around. His owner has already e-mailed me this morning to say that he must've really enjoyed staying at my place because he's a little depressed right now. She also said he's particularly horny. I must've really turned him on... enchanted him with my wiles and my pajama pant legs. Well, they say the way to every man's heart is through his stomach, and I certainly fed Mylo well. Who knew rabbits like bananas?

I started sifting through some of the MP3s I downloaded last night and put on Built to Spill's "Strange." The song was recommended to me by a friend who absolutely raved about it. He knows that I've been on the prowl for a new sound, some new music that really winds my clock, and he promised this song would get me going. I played it. It wasn't bad, but I liked it more when I heard the first time -- when it was called "Where Is My Mind?" and it was by the Pixies. And yes, you've heard that song, it played during the ending of Fight Club. So if anyone knows of any new music that I might like, send suggestions. I'm dyin' ovah heah.

Ah, but Mr. Durst, you think it's for different reasons. Since you see yourself as the pinnacle of the music industry and akin to a god at this point in your rather tenuous career, you figure any "critics" trying to "rap" you are jealous because they don't have the money, fame & power that you do.

I, however, despise you for other reasons. Materialistic reasons. Egotistical reasons. Let's go through some of them, shall we?

1. Limp Bizkit was commissioned to do the title theme song for the movie Mission: Impossible 2. Overall, not a bad deal. Cut a nice rock song, doesn't have to relate entirely to the film, make some money and gain some popularity off it. Until Fred gets his hands on this masterpiece and completely rewrites it to be in a form available to be proclaimed to the masses by the Diocese of Durst -- then the texts usually contain some random and repetitive theme about Fred & his red cap gettin' dissed by the critics. You know we hate you, Fred? We hate you because you took a great opportunity to associate your band with a cultural piece that will have a rather large impact on the American pop world, and you completely perverted it to be a song about your group and how you're getting dissed while a Mission: Impossible theme song plays in the background. Garbage wasn't too far off with "The World In Not Enough," Duran Duran did a fairly relevant job with "A View To a Kill." Why did you have to be an ass about this and try to make everything about you? It all comes down to that egotism again.

2. Fred's a misogynist. Despite the overt messages blaring out from his debut single "Nookie," how many other times have we heard lyrics or read in interviews where he talked about "smackin' bitches" and "put them bitches/wenches in their place"?

3. Fred's a control freak. Once he launches something and it takes off, he still wants to retain full ironclad control. This was evidenced to his rather expletive-laden phone call to Taproot, a band he discovered and put on his label and who are now trying to do their own promotions to possibly move to another label. Fred called up one of their guys and gave him quite the verbal smackdown. He's at least still in control of his other current pet project, Puddle of Mudd, since they let him direct their last video. And of course, we had his own words: "Next time, I'm a do it my way -- it's my way or the highway!"

4. Fred's a damned hypocrite. After over a year of hate and angst-spewed anger that he was mostly responsible for generating, he suddenly sits down at the Concert for New York and tells us all we have to peaceful and loving and caring about each other. This is right before he launches into a rendition of Pink Floyd's "I Wish You Were Here." At this point, I'm thinking aliens have either transreversed his brain, he finally stopped taking the andro supplements that were only working to inflame his temper and his ego, or he's taken one too many happy pills.

At this point, I think that Fred is well beyond his 15 minutes of fame. Limp Bizkit is already starting to fray, what with Wes Borland leaving the group. I figure they'll still scuttle around for a few years, resting on their laurels of being one of the premiere rap-rock groups in the country, then hopefully and blissfully fade into obscurity, leaving behind a small group of growling 10 years old looking for more biscuits. If only we can convince him that the disassociation between his fan base and his megalomaniacism is already beginning, maybe he'd quit sooner...

Ah, but Mr. Durst, you think it's for different reasons. Since you see yourself as the pinnacle of the music industry and akin to a god at this point in your rather tenuous career, you figure any "critics" trying to "rap" you are jealous because they don't have the money, fame & power that you do.

I, however, despise you for other reasons. Materialistic reasons. Egotistical reasons. Let's go through some of them, shall we?

1. Limp Bizkit was commissioned to do the title theme song for the movie Mission: Impossible 2. Overall, not a bad deal. Cut a nice rock song, doesn't have to relate entirely to the film, make some money and gain some popularity off it. Until Fred gets his hands on this masterpiece and completely rewrites it to be in a form available to be proclaimed to the masses by the Diocese of Durst -- then the texts usually contain some random and repetitive theme about Fred & his red cap gettin' dissed by the critics. You know we hate you, Fred? We hate you because you took a great opportunity to associate your band with a cultural piece that will have a rather large impact on the American pop world, and you completely perverted it to be a song about your group and how you're getting dissed while a Mission: Impossible theme song plays in the background. Garbage wasn't too far off with "The World In Not Enough," Duran Duran did a fairly relevant job with "A View To a Kill." Why did you have to be an ass about this and try to make everything about you? It all comes down to that egotism again.

2. Fred's a misogynist. Despite the overt messages blaring out from his debut single "Nookie," how many other times have we heard lyrics or read in interviews where he talked about "smackin' bitches" and "put them bitches/wenches in their place"?

3. Fred's a control freak. Once he launches something and it takes off, he still wants to retain full ironclad control. This was evidenced to his rather expletive-laden phone call to Taproot, a band he discovered and put on his label and who are now trying to do their own promotions to possibly move to another label. Fred called up one of their guys and gave him quite the verbal smackdown. He's at least still in control of his other current pet project, Puddle of Mudd, since they let him direct their last video. And of course, we had his own words: "Next time, I'm a do it my way -- it's my way or the highway!"

4. Fred's a damned hypocrite. After over a year of hate and angst-spewed anger that he was mostly responsible for generating, he suddenly sits down at the Concert for New York and tells us all we have to peaceful and loving and caring about each other. This is right before he launches into a rendition of Pink Floyd's "I Wish You Were Here." At this point, I'm thinking aliens have either transreversed his brain, he finally stopped taking the andro supplements that were only working to inflame his temper and his ego, or he's taken one too many happy pills.

At this point, I think that Fred is well beyond his 15 minutes of fame. Limp Bizkit is already starting to fray, what with Wes Borland leaving the group. I figure they'll still scuttle around for a few years, resting on their laurels of being one of the premiere rap-rock groups in the country, then hopefully and blissfully fade into obscurity, leaving behind a small group of growling 10 years old looking for more biscuits. If only we can convince him that the disassociation between his fan base and his megalomaniacism is already beginning, maybe he'd quit sooner...

So Mylo's gone. And my roommate's girlfriend is back working the dayshift, so he's staying at her place again and I haven't seen him in 2 days. I thoroughly cleaned my room tonight to unbunnyproof it and vacuum up all the hay and dust that has collected. Without Mylo's cage and that damn network server, my room actually looks a little more spacious. But now I basically have the entire apartment to myself again.

On the other hand, my social life seems to be expanding again, which is a good thing. My neighbors who live around the corner invited me over for a surprise birthday party for one of their roommates on Friday night. My friend Julie (Mylo's mom) has invited me to catch a showing of Shallow Hal this weekend. And I actually went downstairs to the workout room and ran for half an hour today on the elliptical trainer.

So now if only I can get a job, I'll be all set. Until that happens, I'll continue to sleep until 11AM every morning.

So Mylo's gone. And my roommate's girlfriend is back working the dayshift, so he's staying at her place again and I haven't seen him in 2 days. I thoroughly cleaned my room tonight to unbunnyproof it and vacuum up all the hay and dust that has collected. Without Mylo's cage and that damn network server, my room actually looks a little more spacious. But now I basically have the entire apartment to myself again.

On the other hand, my social life seems to be expanding again, which is a good thing. My neighbors who live around the corner invited me over for a surprise birthday party for one of their roommates on Friday night. My friend Julie (Mylo's mom) has invited me to catch a showing of Shallow Hal this weekend. And I actually went downstairs to the workout room and ran for half an hour today on the elliptical trainer.

So now if only I can get a job, I'll be all set. Until that happens, I'll continue to sleep until 11AM every morning.

I didn't even mind taking Mylo back to his mommy and daddy that much, even though I will miss him and he already has shown that he has become attached to me in the last 2 1/2 weeks. It was getting there and back that I minded.

First of all, there was the idiot who passed me on a one-lane-each-way road. I'm sorry that you and your little girlfriend felt that I was possibly going too slow for you, but I was doing 35 in a 25 mph zone anyways and I figured you probably wouldn't need to go faster than that. But just because you didn't see the stopline and the big "STOP" letters printed on the pavement, that doesn't mean you get to pass me and give me the finger, you prick. You must be related to the other prick I met up with later, who honked at me several times because I was stopped at a red light in a go-straight-or-turn-right lane. I couldn't help it that I had to make a right turn just past the intersection so I was in the right lane but couldn't run the red light so you could make your right turn on red.

Second of all, let's all say the word "merge" together. Merge. It's a nice word, isn't it? It means to come together into one. It's a happy thing. But dammit, if you're merging into my lane, I've got right-of-way and you don't speed ahead of me to cut me off, especially when there's plenty of room behind me. That's not happy. That makes me want to attach a portable rocket launcher to my roof and fire it off in your direction, which -- while it would make me happy -- would probably make you very unhappy. Being hit by a HEAT (high-explosive anti-tank) round would probably ruin your day.

And yet, the madness didn't end when I got home! I finally got my cancelled check from my October COBRA payment back in the mail, so I could finally fill out the forms and send them off to the state of Massachusetts for reimbursement for my health insurance payments as part of my unemployment. No worries. Money coming in is always a good thing. So I start filling out the form, and it has a space for insurance company address. Again, no worries, let me just punch up http://www.cigna.com and I'll get that. Except for the fact that due to the wonderful bureaucracy over at CIGNA, they don't list their address on their website. Anywhere. They have cities listed where they have a presence but don't list the addresses of their offices in those cities, and they don't have a central office address listed and that's the address I need. What, are they hiding so that people won't be able to find out where they are in order to submit claims? Is that how they make their money? After 15 minutes of poring through the site (including a rather extensive search through the "Where is CIGNA?" page), I finally just put the P.O. box listed on my insurance card. That was the only address I could find. Stupid moron bureaucrats.

On top of all that, I'm still proving to myself that I am The Dumbest Man Alive. I took my new MP3/CD player in the car today for the drive, thinking how happy I was to be able to have good music in the car again. But there was something funny with the sound... I couldn't quite pinpoint it... the equalizer was way off. There wasn't any midrange. Argh. So I played with the equalizers, nothing worked. I figured, well, maybe I'm just not used to the sound, maybe there's something with the processing that it doesn't filter through the car well. Either way, I made it all the way to my friend's house, dropped off Mylo, and was almost a third of the way back before I happened to glance at the car adapter connection and saw that the jack wasn't in all the way. I plugged it in all the way. The sound instantly got 1000% better, and there was tons of midrange. I'm such an idiot.

I didn't even mind taking Mylo back to his mommy and daddy that much, even though I will miss him and he already has shown that he has become attached to me in the last 2 1/2 weeks. It was getting there and back that I minded.

First of all, there was the idiot who passed me on a one-lane-each-way road. I'm sorry that you and your little girlfriend felt that I was possibly going too slow for you, but I was doing 35 in a 25 mph zone anyways and I figured you probably wouldn't need to go faster than that. But just because you didn't see the stopline and the big "STOP" letters printed on the pavement, that doesn't mean you get to pass me and give me the finger, you prick. You must be related to the other prick I met up with later, who honked at me several times because I was stopped at a red light in a go-straight-or-turn-right lane. I couldn't help it that I had to make a right turn just past the intersection so I was in the right lane but couldn't run the red light so you could make your right turn on red.

Second of all, let's all say the word "merge" together. Merge. It's a nice word, isn't it? It means to come together into one. It's a happy thing. But dammit, if you're merging into my lane, I've got right-of-way and you don't speed ahead of me to cut me off, especially when there's plenty of room behind me. That's not happy. That makes me want to attach a portable rocket launcher to my roof and fire it off in your direction, which -- while it would make me happy -- would probably make you very unhappy. Being hit by a HEAT (high-explosive anti-tank) round would probably ruin your day.

And yet, the madness didn't end when I got home! I finally got my cancelled check from my October COBRA payment back in the mail, so I could finally fill out the forms and send them off to the state of Massachusetts for reimbursement for my health insurance payments as part of my unemployment. No worries. Money coming in is always a good thing. So I start filling out the form, and it has a space for insurance company address. Again, no worries, let me just punch up http://www.cigna.com and I'll get that. Except for the fact that due to the wonderful bureaucracy over at CIGNA, they don't list their address on their website. Anywhere. They have cities listed where they have a presence but don't list the addresses of their offices in those cities, and they don't have a central office address listed and that's the address I need. What, are they hiding so that people won't be able to find out where they are in order to submit claims? Is that how they make their money? After 15 minutes of poring through the site (including a rather extensive search through the "Where is CIGNA?" page), I finally just put the P.O. box listed on my insurance card. That was the only address I could find. Stupid moron bureaucrats.

On top of all that, I'm still proving to myself that I am The Dumbest Man Alive. I took my new MP3/CD player in the car today for the drive, thinking how happy I was to be able to have good music in the car again. But there was something funny with the sound... I couldn't quite pinpoint it... the equalizer was way off. There wasn't any midrange. Argh. So I played with the equalizers, nothing worked. I figured, well, maybe I'm just not used to the sound, maybe there's something with the processing that it doesn't filter through the car well. Either way, I made it all the way to my friend's house, dropped off Mylo, and was almost a third of the way back before I happened to glance at the car adapter connection and saw that the jack wasn't in all the way. I plugged it in all the way. The sound instantly got 1000% better, and there was tons of midrange. I'm such an idiot.

Some moron out in San Francisco won Nintendo of America's "What Would You Do For A GameCube?" contest by becoming a Pikmin, which is apparently a kind of insect character from an upcoming Nintendo GameCube game. The guy shaved his hair off, mounted a leaf on top of his head and painted himself blue (because that's what the characters look like), then ate a bowl of Pikmin food (which includes worms and crickets). His prize was a new GameCube, a Game Boy advance, some games and $5000.

Now I've done a lot of stupid and self-deprecating things in my lifetime to draw attention to myself (including allowing my a cappella group to try to sell me on stage for 10 cents and a can of kosher ham glaze -- although I have no clue where they found that -- in an attempt to humorously raise money to record a CD), but I don't think I'd ever stoop that low. The only way you'd get me to shave my head and paint myself blue is if you offered me a full-time job as a member of the Blue Man Group. At least they eat Twinkies, not insects.

Some moron out in San Francisco won Nintendo of America's "What Would You Do For A GameCube?" contest by becoming a Pikmin, which is apparently a kind of insect character from an upcoming Nintendo GameCube game. The guy shaved his hair off, mounted a leaf on top of his head and painted himself blue (because that's what the characters look like), then ate a bowl of Pikmin food (which includes worms and crickets). His prize was a new GameCube, a Game Boy advance, some games and $5000.

Now I've done a lot of stupid and self-deprecating things in my lifetime to draw attention to myself (including allowing my a cappella group to try to sell me on stage for 10 cents and a can of kosher ham glaze -- although I have no clue where they found that -- in an attempt to humorously raise money to record a CD), but I don't think I'd ever stoop that low. The only way you'd get me to shave my head and paint myself blue is if you offered me a full-time job as a member of the Blue Man Group. At least they eat Twinkies, not insects.

Something I forgot to mention in my last entry -- Britney Spears recently announced how excited she was that she was able to cover Pat Benatar's "I Love Rock & Roll." Uhhh, Britney? Last I checked, "I Love Rock & Roll" was done by Joan Jett & The Blackhearts. Thanks for playing.

I grabbed The Catcher in the Rye off my bookshelf last night on my way out the door so I could have something to read on the T. It's been a while since I've read it, but I have a bad habit of re-reading books over and over, and especially books I own because they're conveniently located in my apartment, in addition to the fact that I know what's going to happen so I can just kind of leaf through my favorite parts if I'm only looking for something to pick up for a half-hour or something.

Either way, paging through the book, I couldn't remember why I ever liked it. In fact, I couldn't remember why the book is considered an American classic. It's just the story of a scrawny screwup kid who quits school, acts like a smartass in New York, gets beat up a few times, has hormone issues and who's afraid of telling his parents he flunked out of another school. While I'm not advocating that schools ban it like they have, I'm just saying that it doesn't seem all that revolutionary either in content or style that it should be considered one of the Great American Books of All Time. I could probably find a few random blogs of some teenagers that are written better and more interesting than The Catcher in the Rye.