There are definite perks to my job. And some of them involve me doing dumb things.

A group of very attractive female singers came into our office today to promote their new single. After we watched the video for it, they did an a cappella medley of some of their other songs. While we were taking pictures, I mentioned that I used to sing a cappella as well. So they insisted that I sing for them. After some cajoling, I eventually busted into a rendition of the Housemartins' "Caravan of Love." I think they rather liked it. And my co-workers that were in the room seemed surprised that yes, I really could sing and I wasn't lying when I said I'd been in a group for many years. Though, looking back on it, I can't believe that I sang in front of professional recording artists, two record label executives and some of my bosses at work.

I related it to my best friend over IM later in the day, and the situation reminded me of when I went out with some new friends here in L.A. (who happened to be female) and I said something along the lines of the fact that I wished we went to the bar down the street because they were doing karaoke there and I could prove my coolness. They were gracious and said I was already cool in their eyes, I didn't need to prove anything. But I still feel -- to this day -- like I'm more comfortable behind a couple of CD players or a microphone when I'm meeting new people or hanging out with people, especially female people.

My best friend said that yes, it's natural I should feel that way. Music is my thang. I do it well. It suitably impresses people. It's where I shine, and it's not wrong for me to want to impress people and make them think I'm cool, so it's natural for me to want to use it. Unfortunately, it's when I'm away from it that I feel like I need the crutch. I mean, I'm not socially inept and I can be witty and charming like the rest of them, but it's there where I really stand out. I remember performing with my college a cappella group when we literally packed the coffeehouse to the point where there were people climbing the walls outside to look into through the windows, and the women would absolutely scream for us.

So I guess I'm just going to have to find myself a way to get back behind those CD players and up on that stage. Because it's my thing.