Why? Because it's fun. I got the idea from Michele, who is cooler than all hell (yes, that was supposed to rhyme). She put "Michele is" into Google and hit search. I put "Keith is" into Google for me, but mine are considerably less interesting than hers. Here's what I got (my occasional comments in italics, all else taken directly from Google without alteration):

- Keith is the real acoustic blues king!
- Keith is the Male Sex God! I'm not making this up, nor is that from my own site.
- President Keith is going to burst your bubble!
- Keith is (probably correctly) convinced that about half of the rappers on this planet are “tryin’ to copy my sh**"
- Keith is still listening...
- Keith is dedicated to giving you this arsenal to take home with you.
- Keith is a former Powerlifting and Olympic lifting champion, with an impressive athletic resume in football, track and wrestling. Daaaaaaaamn, I wish that was me.
- Keith is lucky that his wife, Marsha, is also a big Elvis fan.
- Keith is not a man playing a guitar, he IS a guitar.
- Keith is a Parts Manager and Sharon is an Accountant. Put me out of my misery now, please...
- Keith is holding his beat-up 1970 Martin D-35 guitar in classic Palookaville style. Must have something to do with me being a guitar.
- Keith is more like a 3D commando. Watch out while I go conquer that fourth dimension.
- Keith is a bright and energetic young girl living on the Indiana frontier in the mid-1800s. Say what???
- Keith is jumping around the audience like an ape.
- Keith is always hangin' out with some cool people and the pictures prove it! Damn straight.
- Keith is always the center of attraction. Yeah! More!
- Keith is nothing else if not stimulating, and Keith may be downright challenging or irritating at times. Believe it or not, they're talking about someone else but this has actually been said about me.
- Keith is pissed at his record label.
- Keith is the only deaf skater in Madison, Alabama.
- Keith is my darling. Awwwww...
- Keith is a singularity in the space/time continuum. Just as long as I'm not a naked singularity.
- Keith is the best pro barefooter in the world.
- Keith is having a great time playing at Joey Ramone's Christmas party in New York City on Wednesday.
- Keith is located on the Dukes Highway (8), 240 km. east of Adelaide.
- Keith is proving to be one of Belize's worst natural disasters of this century. Watch out, El Salvador! Here I come!
- Keith is working very hard to see to it that no more of you idiots get tied to a bed and starved to death.

This could go on for a while... but I think I'll just head off to sleep.