So, it appears that I failed my unconscious goal of offending everyone I came into contact with today... mostly because some of the people I consort with are of like mind and appreciate warped humor, but then there are those who just don't appreciate a good dead pope reference. Oh, and for the Andy Rooney fans out there? I was being nice when I called him "curmudgeonly." You may now take offense. Yeah, yeah, going to hell, driving the bus there, blah blah blah. Spring really has arrived in Los Angeles, and it appears the fog that has been shrouding my brain for months is finally beginning to lift. The evil gleam is returning to my eye, and I'm feeling more like my old self again. The thing is, I never really believed in Seasonal Affective Disorder or any of these fancy psychological issues that face America today (even though my B.A. is in Psychology -- mostly because the human mind fascinates me... and learning about it gives me more ideas about how to twist others. I hate people, but I love gatherings! Isn't it ironic?). I often wonder how the people of yesteryear dealt with life as they knew it without Prozac, Paxil or Zoloft. I suppose it's because they were too busy dodging witch accusations and being eaten by bears to really worry about the spankings they were getting in school and absentee fathers who spent all their time out harvesting tobacco so they didn't have time to spend at home being loving dads -- and how all that would affect them in later lives. Our bears are caged, our witches have Constitutional protection so we can't burn them, and our tobacco is harvested for us and sold at 7-11s around the country, so I guess the only thing we really do have to stress about anymore is missing the latest episode of America's Top Model because we forgot it moved to Friday (unless, of course, TiVo got it for us -- then we have nothing to worry about). So much for the frontier spirit of America. The Monroe Doctrine and Manifest Destiny™ died years ago -- it's been replaced by commercialism and the need for a Starbucks on every corner and a Walmart in every mall.