Okay, so PETA is suing the California Dairy Farmers for putting all these commercials on TV about the happy cows in California. For those of you reading this from beyond state lines, the tagline is "good milk comes from happy cows, happy cows come from California." PETA is claiming that California cows really aren't happy, they're corralled into overstuffed barns and overmilked and have their calves ripped away from them shortly after birth and are eventually painfully slaughtered.

So, besides the fact that I haven't seen PETA give any of these cows a psychological analysis, I'm still wondering where the rest of their tree-hugging legions are -- they're definitely not hugging the trees. Every year, thousands upon thousands of trees get harvested and cut down for Christmas; they're decorated, used, then thrown out. These trees are living, "breathing" (in a way) creatures, right? So how come the environmentalists -- who go chasing us down every Thanksgiving, begging us to eat tofu instead of turkey -- aren't lambasting us for cutting down the trees?

I sense a double-standard in the environmentalists' world, where animals are meant to be saved, but trees are okay to kill. Me, I want a level playing field. If they're not going to protest the Christmas trees, I want to be able to eat my Thanksgiving turkey in peace without Fiona Apple banging my door down.

Personally, I don't care much about either... if people want to cut down trees for Christmas and kill turkeys for Thanksgiving, that's fine with me. But from what I see in those commercials, those cows seem pretty happy.