Ladies and gentlemen, your hard-earned tax dollars at work, your cellular phone minutes in use, and your busy signals on the emergency lines preventing you from getting through while your house is on fire:

From Sunday's Los Angeles Times:
As a veteran 911 operator with the California Highway Patrol, Deanna Mora has been trained to calm distraught murder witnesses, comfort suicidal callers and make peace during angry domestic disputes. But she was not prepared for the call she received not long ago from an upset woman who had just left a pet grooming salon in Orange County. The woman's emergency? Her dog had just received a bad haircut and she wanted the police to take some action.

Operator: 911. Do you have an emergency?
Caller: Yeah, I'm in a taxi, and the taxi driver is telling me he is not taking me where I'm supposed to go, and he is going to take me back where he picked me up from.
Operator: Unfortunately, sir, that is not a life-threatening emergency. Is he threatening you in any way?
Caller: Yeah. He is taking me back out of my way.

Operator: 911.
Caller: Can I ask you one question? There is nothing going on. I just want to ask you one question. I lost my wallet on the bus and I have the feeling that the bus driver took it because I'm sure it was in the bus. And I was asking the bus driver if he can possibly, like, let me see his bag just to make sure he didn't take it. I know it's rude but ... I was 90% sure that he can be the only person who took it.
Operator: What you have to do is call the bus company and talk to them.
Caller: But they can't do anything.
Operator: I beg your pardon.
Caller: They can't do anything.
Operator: Who can't do anything?
Caller: My question is....
Operator: I'm telling you to call the bus company and talk to them. You are tying up my 911 line.

Operator: 911 emergency. What are you reporting?
Caller: Yeah, can you have a patrol car come to the El Segundo (park) on Imperial Highway at the doggie park? They have the small dogs in with the big dogs, and there is a problem.

Operator: 911 emergency. What are you reporting?
Caller: Yes, I'm calling to report a missing street in L.A.
Operator: A missing street?
Caller: Yes, I couldn't find Evergreen Street in L.A. from the 1000 block to 700. It's missing. It's really missing. I looked on the map and drove around, and I couldn't find it.