A call about a possible weapon at a middle school prompted police to put armed officers on rooftops, close nearby streets and lock down the school. All over a giant burrito.
Someone called authorities Thursday after seeing a boy carrying something long and wrapped into Marshall Junior High. The drama ended two hours later when the suspicious item was identified as a 30-inch burrito filled with steak, guacamole, lettuce, salsa and jalapeños and wrapped inside tin foil and a white T-shirt. After the lockdown was lifted but before the burrito was identified as the culprit, parents pulled 75 students out of school.
The burrito was part of eighth-grader Michael Morrissey’s extra-credit assignment to create commercial advertising for a product. “We had to make up a product and it could have been anything. I made up a restaurant that specialized in oddly large burritos,” Morrissey said.
I have absolutely no comment. I’m laughing too hard to say anything. Although, as one of my co-workers said, “The Oddly Large Burritos” would make a great band name.
In other news, I watched Star Trek: Enterprise tonight, and they showed an episode that featured that evil mirror universe—you know, the one where in the old original Trek series, we knew they were evil because Spock had a goatee, hence earning anyone with a goatee the nickname “Evil [insert name here].” So here’s my thing about the evil mirror universe: They were so evil and constantly plotting against each other to gain power and assassinating leaders in order to get promotions… how do people live long enough to actually get to power? I swear, in this two-episode arc alone, they killed two captains and two admirals and overthrew the Emperor of the Earth Empire. At the rate the people in the evil universe are going, 10-year-olds should be running the show because everyone old enough to pick up a phaser and kill their superior officers is going to do it in order to get promoted.