Sorry I don't have the fancy bassline that accompanies the MTV News thing going on here. But, quite frankly, I'm cooler than MTV. And I won't shave my head and wave metal hand-signs at you and yell out, "Salutations!" like that fuckhead Iannnnnnnnn Robinson. Anyways, I probably shouldn't do this, but here's something cool I helped to put together that we're running in one of my company's daily faxes tomorrow (Thursday) morning. The L.A.-area readers will especially appreciate this, I think. And it just goes to prove my point -- Germans love David Hasselhoff. Oh wait, wrong country and wrong celebrity... International House Of Incidents Details are still sketchy, but we caught the tail end of a great radio bit that aired yesterday on KROQ/Los Angeles. If it's legit, it's huge! Apparently, entertainment reporter/voice guy Ralph from Kevin & Bean's morning show attempted to call French President Jacques Chirac while posing as Jerry Lewis! No one was more shocked than Ralph when, after somehow getting past Chirac's secretary, he was actually put through to the French leader -- allegedly -- where he was forced to ad-lib a brief conversation that included questions about Iraq and France's position on a possible war. The call ended with Chirac and "Jerry" promising to meet the next time Lewis was in Paris. A call to the station yielded this guarded response: "We are looking into it, and, beyond that, I have no comment," says KROQ VP/GM Trip Reeb.